Tirades
Friday, March 4th, 2005 by joelIndulge me for a moment. Scroll up. Little further. Good. See that? It’s something we in the industry call a ‘comic.’ Yes, I realize by this time I should be a smoldering pile of ashes courtesy of the Sarcasm Search and Destroy machine. Lets say I learned the sidestep key. I learned it well.
That sucker up there takes a lot more work than you might commonly believe. Did I mention that I am also lazy? Yes, it is the mere adulations of an adoring public that motivates me, and when that stuff dries up, I got nothing.
I used to think, you know, when I first created the webpage, that the pretty pictures were what drew the crowds. I posted some essay type material beneath the comic mostly just because all the cool kids were doing it, and, heaven help me, I wanted to be like them.
How could I have known that people wanted to read what I wrote? Nothing in my lifetime of generally being ignored the moment I open my mouth could have prepared me for that eventuality.
Yes, every time someone comments on the page, they first talk about the so-called ‘Tirades’ posted under the comic, and I get a dismissive ‘oh, and the comic is nice, too.’
Now if I were to critic’ myself as an armchair philosopher, I would first like to mention the little-known fact that I tend to destroy armchairs vigorously on a regular basis. Which I feel tends to disqualify me from the get go. Other than that I’m overly paranoid, and due to some latent passive aggression, I generally talk about things that aren’t very controversial.
No, I take that back. It’s not so much passive aggression. It’s more that arguments tend to anger and divide people without solving any real problems, and also that I find a lot of the things people become so horribly upset over to be more misdirection from real problems. See? An entirely serious paragraph. You’re probably longing for the comic right about now.
But here, let’s talk about an issue: Bloggers. I assume that is how it is spelled. I don’t generally read Blogs. I find the entire idea of reading other people’s opinions to be odd. I mean have we not been taught from early on that opinions are just poorly thought out ideas based on a lack of real information? Yet here I am, doing something very similar to Blogging, and surprise of surprises, people actually want to read it. Curious. This is just further proof that no one in the world thinks the same way I do and that, just as all my friends told me in first grade, I am weird.


