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The Intern Chronicles
Friday, January 9th, 2004 by joelIt was a day like any other, except it wasn’t. I sat at my desk not working but watching TV, like a good intern. Joel was in his office feverishly working on today’s strip on cafeteria food and writing an article about the meaning of life. Mike (the black-hole) was shirtless (shutter) and playing Hitman 2. Then out of nowhere came a strangeStrange: we are all strange, so it is no surprise that strange happens. voice.
“Hey intern, come here.� Came the strangeStrange: we are all strange, so it is no surprise that strange happens. voice.
“God?� I asked and looked to the ceiling.
“I told you to stop calling me that. It’s Joel. Now can you get me some coffee?� Joel asked.
“Oh okay.� I said as I got up the couch and headed towards the coffee machine. When I got to the kitchen I found something disturbing. The Coffee machine was in shambles. Wires were hanging out of the sides, the dials were missing and the pot was replaced with an old tennis shoe.
“Uh Joel, the Coffee machine’s broken� I called.
“Who broke it?� he asked.
“I think R-2 and I.M. 4000 did it when they had that party.� Mike yelled.
“Oh well then go out and buy some coffee then.� Joel Commanded.
I contemplated this for a little bit. Then I remembered the Oath of the intern I had taken: I pledge to do as little work and be as obnoxious as possible. The balances in my mind were moving from go get the coffee and epées Joel or do I obey my Intern oath and do the least amount of work possible. Finally it came to me.
“Hey Joel can I borrow R-2 and I.M. 4000 I’m going to build a time machine so I can go back to when the coffee machine wasn’t broken.� I said with a vote of confidence in my voice.
“Huh, yea sure.� Joel replied.
And so the building of the great and impossible machine began. I.M. 4000 and R-2 spent most of the time arguing on what it looked like while I was busy building the flux capacitor. It took some time but after a few hours it was finished and it looked like one of the teacups from Disney land. R-2 explained why but I really wasn’t paying attention.
I got in what I referred to as the teacups of time, set the date, and turned the key in the ignition.
