It had been
four weeks.? Four long, dark weeks, growing darker for every fraction of
an inch that my eyelids fell over my disparate pupils.? I didn’t know
how long I could withstand the darkness that called, beckoned to me with
the tempting allure of a woman in eveningwear.? Where was that intern?

Even now with the weariness seeping into my very
soul like cheep red wine on a doily I could clearly remember back to
four weeks ago when I had last seen the intern.?

“Intern,” I had said, “get me coffee.”

Grumbling, the intern stepped out.? Grumbling, the
intern stepped back in again.

“The coffee machine is broken,” he said.

?”What’s wrong with it?”

“It seems to have disappeared entirely.”

?”That’s fine,” I sighed wearily and rubbed my
temples, “we never actually HAD a coffee machine.? Go OUT and get me
coffee.? Here’s a quarter.”

Interns.? What’re ya gonna do?

So he left, slinking out like a sixteen year old
with the keys to his dad’s pinto stashed under his pillow.

And that’s the last I heard of him.? For the first
few hours after he was gone, I was fine.? But gradually I slipped ever
further into the churning and hideous exile of a coffee-free existence.

I’ve been huddled up in this big comfy chair I
swiped from my roommate for the last few days my spine gradually curving
into a fetal posture.? Sweat and tears are soaking the once soft
exterior to this chair, and the shadows are creeping as the sun goes
lower in the sky.? Its that time of year.? Some people get depressed
with the waning of the winter light.? Not me, though.? I just feel sad,
and hopeless and sleep a lot.? But I can’t sleep now.? What’s the point
of waiting for coffee to wake you up if you are just going to go to
sleep anyway?

This is stupid.? I don’t even drink coffee.? I get
caffeine from various cola products and iced tea.? Why did I even ask
that intern to go get me coffee?? I’m so confused.? My sleep-deprived
brain is playing tricks on me.

The
intern returned yesterday.? He showed up for game night as if he had not
even been missing for four weeks.? He was too exhausted to give me the
full details about his adventure getting me coffee.? All he could do was
mutter something about Hamptaro vs. Dragonball Z.? Whatever that is.?
Oh, and he forgot my coffee.

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